This is the story of our honeymoon. As I write this, it's not all written down yet... we have notes in a notebook, photos, and videos, along with our memories, to consolidate. But here's the backstory:
We went to Italy because both of us had it on our short lists of places to visit before we die. Jessie's interest was mainly because of the art -- she took a whole class just on the Rennaissance and is a particular fan of Michelangelo, plus as we learned Italy has a whopping 60% of all the world's archeological treasures, according to the UN.
I was interested mainly because of its environmental situation, which may require some explanation... When I worked at World Population Balance a few years back and was studying population-related statistics, Italy kept showing up as an outlier: it's one of the few countries whose population is shrinking (due to the low birth rate and unusually low immigration rate); it has one of the oldest median ages and is getting older (due again to the low birth rate and also a low death rate), yet its GDP is strong, quality of life and other happiness indeces are high, and agriculture is still as productive as ever even though Italy has been farmed consistently for longer than any other country on earth. So they must be doing something right, and I wanted to see what that was... considering that worldwide population is predicted to decline (at last) during our lifetimes, I figured a look at Italy might be a look at a sustainable future. Plus, Venice is underwater in the way that many coastal cities may soon be -- how are they handling it?
Our itinerary was pretty straightforward: 3 days in Rome, 3 days in Florence, 3 days in Venice, traveling by train, and 3 days to drive back to Rome in a rental car. For the most part we stayed on track. There were some misadventures along the way, but they only helped us to appreciate more the parts that did happen according to plan, and to appreciate that we got through them smoothly as a couple. So all in all it was a perfect honeymoon!
Read on - click the links below to navigate. If you're reading this before we've completed writing it, new pages will show up on the home page as well as in the table of contents.
Public relations is such a fragile thing. A company can spend millions polishing and maintaining its reputation, only to let you down when it matters most. Another company can treat you like crap repeatedly, consistently cutting corners in a heartless bureaucracy, and then in one beautiful, human moment make you want to sing their name from the rooftops. In this particular moment it may still be premature to say which company is which.
But first, the backstory. I bought our tickets to Italy months ago, in the depths of the recession when I thought prices were likely to be lowest. I shopped around and found the best deal I could, which meant going through bargain-hunting Web sites, in this case Vayama. But I've traveled enough to know that on long, international flights, some airlines treat you better than others, so because this is our honeymoon, I spent $100 extra to get us tickets with Lufthansa, a 4-star airline, instead of any of the American airlines, which all rate 3 stars. I have to say I felt a little smug about it, and probably seemed a little snobbish to Jessie, who pointed out that having never flown overseas herself, she wouldn't know the difference. There were some puzzling things about the tickets, like we weren't able to reserve seats on all of them... for example, Jessie's boarding pass from Chicago to Frankfurt showed no seat number. We were assured we could straighten it out once we got to the Lufthansa ticket counter.
One problem: Lufthansa doesn't fly out of Kansas City. The itinerary from Vayama said our flight from KCI to ORD would be on "SUBSIDIARY/FRANCHISE," which turned out to be United, so we got our boarding passes (minus a seat for Jessie) at the United counter in KCI. Neither of us had had particularly good experiences with United in the past -- lots of delays and impersonal service. This was no exception... the plane we needed to get us to Chicago was delayed by weather in Washington -- a city that wasn't even on our outbound itinerary -- and our 2.5 hour layover in Chicago evaporated, leaving us with only minutes to catch the plane to Frankfurt, let alone get Jessie a seat number.
Our plane touched down in Chicago at 9:38 PM and began an excruciatingly slow taxi through the maze of ORD runways to concourse E, while a stewardess informed us that one passenger would still make his connecting flight, to Ohio, but the rest of us would need to speak with a representative either at the gate or at a service desk at concourse C, while meanwhile our next flight was already boarding at concourse B, on time for its 10:00 departure. As we taxied right past our next plane, both Jessie and I (seated two rows apart) wanted to somehow jump off and run across the tarmac, but instead we had to ride another half mile farther on. I ran ahead of Jessie to the gate, arriving completely winded and just a few minutes too late. The Lufthansa representatives at the gate informed me that they held the flight 5 minutes for us, but they could do no more, even though they could see on their screens (they said this, with ill-concealed schadenfreude) that we had landed and were on our way. I asked them to get us to Rome as soon as they could, but they said Lufthansa only has four flights a day out of Chicago, and the next that could get us to Rome would be 24 hours later than the flight we had missed, and they weren't even sure they could get us seats on it. They suggested we talk to United, since it was United's fault we had missed the flight, and since United had more planes to work with.
I should mention at this point that we not only had hotel reservations in Rome, we also had museum reservations. You don't have to buy tickets to Italian museums in advance, but by all accounts it helps. And it ain't cheap. And exchanges are far from certain. And besides, we also had reservations for practically every other day in our itinerary, so what date were we going to exchange them for? Jessie has dreamed of seeing the art at the Vatican for most of her life, and we had the tickets in our hands, and the thought of having to miss seeing the Vatican on this trip because of weather in a city we weren't even passing through made Jessie quite unhappy.
So off we went to that United service desk in concourse C, which is the one you can only reach by underground tunnel. But by this time it was after 10 PM, and the desk was closed when we got there, and the custodian didn't know where to tell us to go. So back we went to the gate in concourse E where we came in. There were still two young women working there, and they were sympathetic to our situation, but they said they knew nothing about international booking, and everyone who did know about it had gone home for the night, except maybe for someone in baggage claim. A young man who had been flirting with them when we arrived said that in the break room there was a phone number for the rate office, and that someone would be working there who knew about international booking, so we should call them. They gave us the number.
The woman at the rate office was indignant that anyone should have given us her number for something unrelated to her job, but she looked up our bookings. She said that since the tickets had been purchased in bulk (i.e. through Vayama) from another airline, there was nothing United could do -- the tickets had no cash value, so there was no way to know what to exchange them for. "They have cash value to us," I assured her, "EXCHANGE THEM FOR TICKETS TO ROME." I told her that Lufthansa had said it was United's fault we had missed the flight. "Honey, they would have said it was our fault if their plane was late," she assured me.
She seemed very sympathetic, and I was all set to thank her for her trouble, but before letting me go she said, "Can I ask you a question? Why didn't you leave Kansas City earlier?" I was speechless. She continued, "I mean, everybody knows you're supposed to allow 3 hours before an international flight. Why didn't you arrange a longer layover in your itinerary?" At this point I lost it. "This is our first trip to Europe," I said, "Our layover was two and a half hours. How were we supposed to know that two and a half hours was not a long enough layover, and that three would have been? It doesn't exactly say that on your Web site!" "You bought your ticket in bulk," she countered, "not through our Web site." "But I've been to your site, and it doesn't say that!" I insisted. "It's just common sense..." she began, and I hung up.
At this point we were crushed. We'd have to begin the fight again when the ticket desks reopened at 6 AM. Neither airline would put us up in a hotel because the delay was weather-related, but they gave us coupons worth an unspecified discount at an unspecified assortment of hotels. I booked a room for a reasonable price at the Candlewood Suites (which we had fond memories of from when our basement was flooded with sewage, no seriously, fond memories), and we headed to the baggage claim to see where our bags had wound up.
Now, this is where the bureaucracy finally started working in our favor. The first guy we talked to could have just said forget it, you're not getting your bags back tonight, but instead he said it wasn't his job and sent us to the baggage service desk. There a woman named Patti glanced at our claim checks and said, "The bags are being held in International departures -- they'll be sent on to Rome on your new itinerary." "We don't have a new itinerary yet," I pointed out. She tapped a few keys and handed us a sheet of paper. "There's your new itinerary," she said. We were incredulous -- the flights were on United, getting us into Rome on the morning of our Vatican reservation, more than eight hours before Lufthansa's best offer. "But they said we couldn't do that because we bought our tickets from Lufthansa," I protested before I could think better of it. "Oh, shoot, you didn't tell me that," said Patti. "Well, let's see if I can check you in." Tappity tappity: boarding passes. And Jessie and I even had adjoining seats! "The worst that can happen now is that I get yelled at tomorrow," said Patti.
We were overflowing with gratitude. Jessie said, "If we were planning to have children, we'd give you our firstborn!" ("I've got some of my own," said Patti.) I said, "If you're ever near Emporia, Kansas, give us a call!" and gave her my card. What else could we do? Put in a word with her supervisor and risk exposing some wrongdoing that would cost us our tickets? Better to wait until after the trip for that...
We're not out of the woods yet; we have to change planes again in Washington -- the same airport that cost us yesterday's connection -- so there could be another delay. And even if there's not, we won't quite make it to the Vatican in time to use our reserved tickets, so we may have to reshuffle our itinerary in order to fit everything in. But at least we haven't lost a whole day in Italy, just a night, and we can sleep on the plane. So for the moment, a baggage clerk named Patti has us singing United's praises, and Lufthansa has lost some of its good reputation with us. We'll see where they stand in two weeks!
Moral of the story: the airline may care how much you paid to fly, but the baggage handlers just care about getting to the destination. Follow the luggage!
The night before, we ran right past this dinosaur without seeing it, as we tried to catch our flight.
Although we were disappointed to have missed our original flight, Patti the Baggage Angel made it up to us by promoting us to business class, free of charge! Neither of us had ever flown business class before. The seats are much larger and comfier, and recline most of the way -- or they would if they weren't up against the bulkhead as ours were. Still, the comfiest seats we've ever flown in.
Greater legroom is a mixed blessing... if you put your carry-on bag under the seat in front of you as you're supposed to, you then can't reach it with your seatbelt on!
We weren't originally supposed to fly through Dulles on the way to Italy, only on the way back, but considering that we were only 12 hours late instead of 24, we were inclined to look on the bright side. The rainbows helped.
Apparently Jessie was a little tipsy when she took the picture!
We have had a wonderful two days in Rome. Friday we were surprised to find Patti had booked us in business class seats! So we had a late but very pampered flight to Rome. Saturday we arrived in Rome around 10am. We got through customs quickly as they merely glanced at our passports and stamped them. We went to baggage claim only to wait 45 minutes and then find out our luggage had not made it. We filed a claim, they said our luggage would show up Saturday or Sunday, and went on our way to the city. We hastily checked into the B&B and ran to the Vatican for our 2pm reservation. It was all I hoped and more! We spent 4.5 hours there beginning with the Vatican Museums, then the Sistine Chapel and on to St Peter's Basilica where we say the the Pieta and many other fabulous sculptures! We returned to the B&B to find our luggage had not yet arrived. Saturday night we ate a few blocks from the B&B-- Ben ordered pizza with egg, olive, artichoke, mushroom and broscuitto on it. To our surprise it arrived with all the topings haphazardly placed in their own sections including a big soft boiled consistency egg in the middle. Saturday night I fell asleep very quickly! Today we awoke and had a leisurely breakfast and then went to the Colloseum, Pantheon, and Trevi Fountain. They were all magnificant! Our guide at the Colloseum had a stereotypical Italian accent, adding an ah to the end of all her English words. We stopped back at the B&B and talked to the manager and he said the airport had called and said the luggage would be delivered at dinner time or soon after. Hooray! We then went to dinner. We had pizza again tonight--this time three different kinds...one topped with sliced potatoes. We arrived back at the B&B after dinner--at about 9pm and still no luggage. So Ben asked Freddy, the manager, if he had heard anything and he had not but soon after Freddy came in and said your luggage is on its way! We signed for it and now have it in hand in time to go to Florence tomorrow!
We arrived in Rome at 9:50 AM on Saturday, May 30, but then we waited 30 minutes for our luggage and another hour figuring out how to report the luggage missing, so we didn't leave the airport until about 11:30. We took the Leonardo Express train to the main train station, grabbed a quick lunch of panini and cappuccino, and took the Metro to the neighborhood of our hostel, One Step from St. Peter's. We quickly checked in and ran to the Vatican Museum in time for our reservation... and we were fortunate to have a reservation, because the lines were quite long!
We took more videos than just those below, but they were essentially duplicates of videos other people had already taken and shared on YouTube, so what you see below are just the videos that nobody else had shared before!
Note that Frommer's guide and other guides we consulted said that cameras are not allowed in the museum, nor in St. Peter's Basilica. This does not appear to be the case anymore. The only place in the Vatican where cameras were not allowed was in the Sistine Chapel, and as you can see from the proliferation of amateur photos and videos available online, tourists openly flout that rule. We obeyed it, so we have no footage of the Sistine Chapel.
OK, so it's not actually called the Hall of Heads, but it should be, because there are well over a hundred marble heads in this one hallway, along with full-size statues. It's one of the first rooms you enter when touring the Vatican Museum, so it gives a pretty impressive first look at the scope of the collection. Any one of these sculptures in an American museum would be the prize of their collection.
An ancient Roman marble sculpture of Laocoön and his sons being attacked by serpents.
A zoom shot through just one row of galleries, in an attempt to show the size of the place. Again, any one of these rooms in any other museum would be the highlight of their collection, but here it's just another room.
The entrance and exit to the Vatican Museum are about 4 stories below the actual museum (which is on a hill), so you enter via a long featureless spiral ramp (or take the escalator) and exit by another, much more ornate ramp. This ramp is supported entirely by the walls (has no central support) and gets much steeper as you descend by way of more frequent steps, which should be clear in the video. (Each of the steps also slopes, which is why people have to walk so carefully.) It's also a double helix, so that traffic could enter and exit at the same time, though only one of the helices is in use due to the separate (newer?) entrance.
There's no security at the entrances to the Vatican, but there is a wall.
The wall is long and featureless, flanked by a neverending line of tourists on their way to one entrance or another.
Outside Vatican City, we saw this sign and were baffled... partly because we find the "no stopping" icon counterintuitive (after renting our car, we actually stopped to consult a guide to street signs, only to find that the sign meant we shouldn't stop), and partly because the policeman is holding the face of André the Giant. This was to be the first of many sightings of the OBEY Giant during our trip.
It's not the Swiss Guards' fault their uniforms look like clown suits. They have a real job to do, but this tourist crossed a barrier and walked right up to them so that his wife could get footage of them ordering him to stop.
the illusion was a lot more convincing in person than it looks in the photo.
There are two ramps, forming a double helix, so that one could be used for entry and one for exit, but currently only one is in use.
The steps become more frequent toward the bottom as the slope increases.
The warning is necessary because the steps slope.
Here you can see how the slope increases at the bottom.
The giant plasma screens in St. Peter's Square are probably very functional, but they look very out of place, and they probably won't last five years.
On Sunday (May 31) we faced the prospect of another day without our luggage. We bought some clothes from roadside vendors, washed our traveling clothes, and hung them out the courtyard window.
When exited the Colosseum Metro station, we found that the whole area had been prepared for a bicycle race. At first it was just a curiosity, but later in the day it became a major obstacle to sightseeing!
The bleachers for the bike race were put up right in front of historic, ancient Roman statues, which are about as common as light poles.
Our tour guide provided a lot of useful information that we wouldn't have learned otherwise.
We also enjoyed her classic-a Italian-a accent-a.
A seagull was sporting around inside, for some reason.
The Colosseum is very impressive, not least because it was designed for heavy tourist traffic and has stood up to it for millennia! The upper level is still structurally sound and in active use, currently for a special exhibit about the Flavian dynasty, which was very interesting.
When we got to the Pantheon, a choir was performing inside. The Pantheon is astounding for a number of reasons:
Trevi Fountain is a popular place for tourists. It was very crowded.
We happened to pass a woodworker's shop that had an entire wall of pendulum clocks made to look like various cartoon animals. The pendula were purely decorative -- the clocks were all quartz movement -- but kind of creepy.
There's lots more to the story, in the photos below. That evening the luggage arrived!
The Colosseum was hit by an earthquake and then mined for building materials.
The Colosseum's dedication as a site of Christian martyrdom saved it from being totally deconstructed for building materials. It is now known that Christians were not martyred at the Colosseum after all, but at the Circus Maximus, which was deconstructed. Oh well!
It's hard to believe that a wooden floor could hold several feet of water, but apparently it did, long enough to stage naval battles.
The platform in the foreground, which now has trees growing out of it, originally held a colossal statue of Emperor Nero which gave the Colosseum its name. Although Nero comissioned the Colosseum, he didn't live to see it completed, so the account in I, Claudius of him attending games there is fictitious.
Just how old are these rafters? Inquiring minds want to know!
What amazes me about this building is not just that it's been in continuous use for 2000 years, but that it has a big freaking hole in the roof that lets rain in. I mean, common sense tells you that if you want a building to last, you don't put a hole in the roof, but in this case common sense is apparently wrong.
It seems to me that if the new name hasn't stuck for 1300 years, it's probably not going to stick.
Rome has embraced the Disney version of Pinocchio, with the long nose.
The signs in Florence showed a close-up of a woman's breast.
Yes, the giant chili dog is wielding a circular saw.
We got back from Italy last night, and although we had some misadventures all along the way, for the most part we had a wonderful trip and couldn't wish for a better start to our marriage! We'll spend the next few days digging ourselves out of the backlog of work and mail and such and should start posting photos and stories from the trip sometime next week.
Again, most of the places we went have been the subject of so many videos already that I've only uploaded the ones of ours that were unique!
Passing through the countryside between Rome and Florence, by train
Statues outside the Palazzo Vecchio
The Ponte Vecchio (Old Bridge) has shops all along its sides, except in the middle where you can see where you are on both sides.
Sidewalk artists reproduce Botticelli's "Birth of Venus" in chalk.
Statues in the facade of Santa Maria del Fiore
Gates of Paradise at the Battistero (Baptistry) of Santa Maria del Fiore
View from the top of the Campanile di Giotto
A rooftop bedroom
Assorted rooftop gardens. Despite being named after the goddess of flowers, Florence has relatively little public greenery, but there are window boxes and rooftop gardens to compensate.
Descending the Campanile
Facade of Santa Maria del Fiore at sunset, and another view of the Gates of Paradise
Description of the Gates of Paradise